Apparently, some folks out there are still getting their kicks from *fictional* horror, like Shudder's new 'girls' trip thriller,' 'Find Your Friends.' Starring Bella Thorne and Helena Howard in what critics are calling a 'frustratingly shallow endeavor,' this flick promises to show what happens when a getaway 'goes off the rails.' Cute. Adorable, even. For anyone who's ever just tried to get home from Brooklyn after 1 AM on a Sunday, this 'thriller' sounds like a leisurely stroll through Central Park. Because let's be real, a 'girls' trip' going sideways barely registers on the panic scale when you live in a city where your biggest daily thrill is finding a clean public restroom. 'Off the rails'? Honey, try navigating the L train on a Saturday with a full bladder and a lingering sense of existential dread. Or attempting to split a $300 brunch bill with five 'friends' who only ordered water and 'vibes.' That's a true test of sanity, friendship, and the limits of human endurance, far beyond anything Bella Thorne could ever pretend to experience onscreen. So, if you're truly seeking genuine terror and characters who are absolutely, unequivocally 'off the rails,' save your Shudder subscription fee. Just try to find a reasonably priced studio apartment in Manhattan, or better yet, attempt to hail a cab in the rain during rush hour in Midtown. You'll not only 'find your friends' – if they haven't already moved to Beacon – but you'll experience a horror show far more visceral, frustratingly shallow, and undeniably New York than any movie could ever hope to deliver.